Socien's Blog

Have you ever been asked for money by a homeless person whilst seated on a bench in the park? How many times has this happened just when you have the lowest denominations in your pockets that are so low that you don’t feel that they belong in your pocket? How many times have you given to a beggar in this kind of situation? While the beggar begs thinking that out of the nice jacket you are wearing something unwanted may be given to him, you maybe thinking otherwise: “He is just being lazy” or “he is pretending to be disabled”.

It is hard to give with zero intention to a stranger. But my girlfriend can get a cut of my funds anytime. This, I was told by a sixth born in my dad’s family, is a testimony of a relationship, one that allows the exchange of finances between two. My mother may not get as much as what my lover would get. This is not a me-only matter. Women who have been subject to romance scams wired huge sums to persons they never met thanks to this natural instinct in us. It is not about how many years we have been together through thick and thin that facilitates the free cash flow, I was told. It is the depth of that togetherness.

I just do not know in what parameters that depth develops. But it wouldn’t be a good thing to only show up when you need help. The potential helper could not have any chance to trace your problem and your intentions on solving it. You need to develop a relationship with your helpers and have them not only accustomed but fallen in love with your problem.

That relationship debate aside because your rich relatives won’t help you with capital because they think to get to the top its all hard work not money, right?  Some think all you need to make it to the top is a change in mindset not money. Some think you need more credentials,  certificates and more learning to get to the top and can only help you with getting to credentials.  When you cross the line seperating the poor and the rich and become rich, you understanding of what it takes to get to the top changes becomes one: What took you to the top.

I would rather stick to this: It is just harder to convince me to supply you with capital as a means of getting you to the top if all that made me a CEO were certificates and qualifications. Most of the ideas that require the sole funding of relatives are primitive and lack visible signs of progress. When you present such ideas to a family member you appear to be a scammer. You can’t get help.

When you are asking for capital money from a rich relative you are just being to him what a beggar in the park is like to you. Before you hate your rich relative, understand that giving is not easy for him as it is not easy for you. Besides, people are not as rich as you see them.

Then money makes these rich relatives dominant.  You cannot outsmart a rich person in a discussion about getting richer when you are a moneyless person. You don’t have enough confidence and enough facts to prove that the primitive ways you wish to try can take you to the top,  too. When you are begging for capital, facts,  that you might line up are limited.  You are a beggar. You end up losing and fail to convince them well enough to be able to give you free capital.

More than a poor man a rich person is so scared by financial spills.  It scares the rich person to wake up and feed onto poor relative money that goes straight into paying petty bills but comes out of his pocket disguised as capital. What he does is,  he lets those who come straight asking for money to cover their bills get the money. Those who beg for money to cover their bills are relentless, they keep coming over and over and do not fix a minimal amount they may wish to receive like you may do when asking for capital.

Rich relatives received a countless knocks at their doors of people like you, before yours.  The same people were asking for the same thing,  money.  Many had to fake asking for capital to furnish their ideas just to get money to feed into their stupid expenditures. Rich relatives are people fed up with the same trick. They just know how to get rid of it.  They keep their funds locked in accounts.

It is disappointing to help one who fails. Capital alone cannot take an idea into success. One needs failure. He must fail capitalised, come back for more capital and fail again. If he is ever to get capital from rich relatives it will it will depend on the circumstances rich relatives face, and the mindset they have. On the other hand,  a rich relative certainly encounters situations that demands his capital muscle from poor relatives more when he is rich than when he is poor. He is overloaded. Having managed to become rich won’t make his a man of patience. Patience will determine whether a rich relative will help again one who fails or one who is similar to one who failed before in his helping hands.

Some relatives do not want to see you at the top. Do not waste your effort and time trying to knock at the doors of people who haven’t been there through years of trying times. You don’t have to waste a great chunk of life blaming some other people’s lack of kindness as that which keeps you away from success. But before you think it is them who are just not willing, change your character. Your character can give the your potential helpers reasons to or not help you.

Specialisation.

Dad had died. It was a harsh reality the year 2023 had decided to close itself with. A speech from one of my dad’s brothers at the funeral had a line, “while I am a multi-millionaire, Manu is drowning in poverty.”

Manu was and is my village’s distortion to my actual name, “Meinrad”. I had no choice growing up but to loving many things I could not change like their version of my name. So, speaking of loving, I chose to respect the advice of secondary to “Multimillionaire Uncle’s” advice. But I had avoided him for almost a decade hoping that I would revive our former mingling once at the top mountain of success. The sloppy sides of the mountain had grounded me into failure, and I was 28 when dad died.

Multi-millionaire Uncle welcomed me into his house. He needed to wrap up my issue quickly so he had us discuss about it the night of the I arrived. As hoping that he could just ask what it is I wanted to come up with so that I could my money and start my shopping the following day. You see, I needed a laptop, to pay for my WordPress.com hosting fee, camera and what not. I could not doubt the possibility of an influx of capital witnessing bundles of hundred dollar bills getting in and out of the house frequently through various agents.

Without depleting his reserved of patience I managed to explain briefly the seven years of my writing experience and failure. My annual incomes namely $370, $470, $539 and $945 for 2020, 2021, 2022 and 2023, respectively, were part of this summarised briefing. But he said I should go to College, promising to pay all my tuition, and finance my research and accommodation.

I was frustrated. A “good” second-hand laptop could cost somewhere in the lower two-hundreds. A hosting fee ($325) and a refurbished Huawei Mate 20X ($165) that would stand as both a mobile phone and Camera were cheaper options than a semester of College tuition.

I was beginning to question if Multi-millionaire’s Uncle’s intention was to build or to ruin me. In the previous four year I had told as an assistant Carpenter but I had earnings of my own and they worked. Through them I was getting closer to what I intended to achieve. Now it was harder to become an assistant Caprenter again because I had been replaced by some new recruits.

My response? I retreated to my sound gears of quite ness. I also began watching porn. So, while Multi-millionaire Uncle waited for that time I could talk to him and ask for some funds, but I had not done this in years. Besides he was busy. His ensuite above was the best retreat for him when arrived home, usually late. Early in the morning he would climb down the stairs, movie style, pass by the kitchen to pick his lunchbox. He would then fly from there to the recent S-Class Benz outside silently like an owl. Like a moon, I thought, he cannot be there each time I may need him to shine some light into my darkness.

I had not asked for money from anyone for years. Before University happened I even hustled it out to buy uniforms and school shoes. Now I had to ask for it over and over. Frustration increased when I realised that each meal the maids were serving me with was worth more than the average amount of dollars I earned at average in the previous year. Those dollars now were not in their natural state but in a breakfast with liver, a Mediterranean dinner and so forth.

What I learned from this encounter?

If you want some help from relatives, understand what they specialise in as far as help is concerned. My Multi-millionaire Uncle had an endless list of scholarships he had granted to various individuals. Through this generous offer, he had chiselled a huge chunk of his wealth and progress. Trying to get capital from him was not as easy as it should have been for a scholarship.

A helper or a potential helper is a human being like you, except you don’t share the same mindset and the same level of resources. If the helper/potential helper’s mindset is against yours it is likely that you will not find the type of help you want. You will have to work a lot harder convince and sometimes manipulate such helpers into sympathising with your grand scheme.

Your helpers are specialists. You cannot easily change into financing what they are not familiar with. But you can divert their help. Here is what I did:

• I diverted help. He was not going to give me funds with which to host my blog (business capital). So, while I waited for a semester seven months he paid for my driving lessons (job qualification). He overpaid, and I used the spillovers to upgrade to a basic plan. I waited for the next spillovers to come and keep advancing through them.
• While I had struggled to stay connected in the previous years, having to purchase expensive mobile data packages. I now had a WiFi connection as I stayed at his house. Previously it was also just harder to find the time to write. Manual work occupied my days and exhaustion swept my strength during the night.
• I came up with prompt measures that would make it impossible to spend a day without writing. For instance, I created a WhatsApp group. I was not going to make money out of it or gain any experience, but to spend the whole day without posting to the group was one way to lose membership. I promised to punish myself with fasting for the following day in the event of losing 10 members a day.
• In case of a potential return to College, an Undergrad degree in Psychology would give me chances to write better insprational articles. So I demanded my laptop early, knowing that I was going to use to build a blog.

When trying to get something so important to you, you have to soften and make the helper feel that you and him have one goal. By doing just that you create a relationship with the helper that permit the easy free flow of finances from the helper.